"If you love someone you can read their mind"

"If you love someone you can read their mind" Author Meg Rosoff said in passing this evening at the #bathkidslitfest 

Leaving aside the considerable amount of selfish projection which goes on in loving, I imagine that this can sometimes be true, but how?  Is it because you build an inner image of them, a little homunculus, a 3D moving image that can speak for himself or herself, 

Here's the parts of the brain that move our muscles: the motor cortex.[Notice how your own body image is stretched out, throat at the bottom, bum and feet at the top].

Or is it because you observe the loved one so closely that you pick up transient micro-expressions that transmit distaste or anxiety as clearly as if they had spelt it out for you?

Both, I think.  When I love a woman she appears in my dreams, not only erotic dreams but ordinary night time dreams.  She just appears. I know she's been in the dream although I may not remember what she said or did. That proves to me that I've internalised their presence deep into my unconscious.  It's one of the signs that I am truly in love.  It gives her an eternal presence as my unconscious will continue to present her to me even when she's gone away.  She has acquired an eternal spiritual presence. It also enables me to talk to her when she isn't near me and I might sometimes get close to her real response to things I might say.

Sometimes when I'm getting to know a woman I find their face almost unrecognisable in certain lights.  This used to worry me, "Am I dementing?" I used to think.  I think it's because different sub-personalities, such as the mystic or the practical person are associated with widely different facial expressions, vocabulary and gestures.

Roberto Assagioli advanced the idea of subpersonalitites.  I'm not sure their location is as clear as in the image but they are separate from each other, sometimes even unaware of each other.

 It takes a while to internalise the constellation of features belonging to each fractional change in identity, taken together with position surroundings and intensity and direction of light.

So I think Meg is right but it's always going to be important to verify any intimations because it's so easy to misperceive and idolise or patronise.